Tag Archives: transformation

“Get good at failing”

Wise advice from a dear friend of mine.  And, no, it doesn’t mean “try” to fail.  It is much simpler and much deeper than that.

Getting good at failing – to me – means accepting that I am human and will make mistakes.  If there are consequences, we need to face them bravely and move on.

My definition of mistakes is VERY broad.  Any mistakes, people, we all make them.  From ignoring the truth of those around you to forgetting to get bread at the store.  Anything that “one” deems is a mistake, in their own perception of life, no matter how trivial it might be (as it probably leads to something much deeper).

Mistakes are an opportunity to see how things could have been done differently.  It is a chance to begin again.  How I deal with my own failures, no matter how big or small, must ultimately be acknowledged, accepted and left behind.  I guess in a poetic way, it would be fighting and defending for my own future.

My nephew’s sweet Halloween smile! So full of joy!

If I just pick my head up and move on, without getting caught up emotionally in the concept of failure..just get up and try again.  Deep inside, I know I am not built of failure or I would not be where I am.  I have survived and will continue to do so.

So, why not just get up and try again when I fall on my butt.  Which reminds me of my sweet baby nephew.  He is such a beautiful boy.  He is now running, but he went through a trial of falling and getting back up.  He did not allow the pure awesomeness of opportunites that walking would lead to.  He just knew he didn’t want to keep crawling for the rest of his life.  It is an innate part of us as humans.

Sometimes it can be that simple.

The outcomes in my life are bound to my much different then they have been.  What do you think?

Watch Me Unfold…The Root of My Transformation

Thank you, Pandora, for bringing me such enlightenment in the morning!  This song is an amazing interpretation of my thoughts.  It is the root of my transformation…truly.  My whole life, I have been so afraid of EVERYTHING!  I don’t know why, really, I just am.

By afraid, I mean that I over-think every situation, every decision, and every potential decision until I have overwhelmed myself with “what ifs” and “but then if this happens, that will happen, and so-and-so will be upset, which will lead to such-and-such”.

REALLY?  Who has time for all of that crap?!

I want to LIVE LIFE and just be grateful of each breathing moment God blesses to my loved ones and me.  I want to open my heart to Him and them.  After all, what else is there on this earth worth more than love?

Unfold By Marie Digby

what i can remember
is alot like water
trickling down a page
of the most beautiful colors
i can’t quite put my
finger down on the moment
that i became like … this

you see, i’m the bravest girl
you will ever come to meet
and yet i shrink down to nothing
at the thought of someone
really seeing me
i think my heart is wrapped around
and tangled up in winding weeds

but i don’t wanna go on living
being so afraid of showing
someone else my.. imperfections
even though my feet are trembling
and every word i say comes stumbling
i will bare it all.. watch me unfold

these hands that i hold
behind my back are
bound and broken by my own doing
and i can’t feel
anything, anymore
i need a touch to remind me
i’m still real..

my soul
it’s dying to be free
i can’t live the rest of my life
so guarded
it’s up to me to choose..
what kind of life i lead.

cause i don’t wanna go on living
being so afraid of showing
someone else my.. imperfections
even though my feet are trembling
and every word i say comes stumbling
i will bare it all.. watch me unfold

i will allow someone to love me
i will allow someone to love me…

love me.. love me…

Lyrics by Marie Digby

How I hide from my fatness and other such illusions

This is a great “in-depth” perspective.  It is like what I was walking about in Hiding Behind Fat a few days ago.

How I hide from my fatness and other such illusions.


Photos are here! 328 lbs. vs. 248 lbs.

Here you go.  These pics kind of saved my motivation.  As I mentioned in my 80-pounds lost blog, I look in the mirror, and I still only see the belly that has to go away, or the flabby part of the inner thigh (which I have so tenderheartedly refer to as “giblets.”) 

It wasn’t until I saw these photos that I realized how far I had come.  This is the difference between 328 pounds and 248 pounds.  Can I hear an AMEN?!

Stockdale Paradox

This is actually pretty good stuff.  At first, I didn’t want to read it, because it sounded too…well, boring.

Boring, it was not.  In fact, it became more of a self discovery epiphany.  (Read the article and we will talk again about it.)

There was a quote that captured me, and in reading the article, I found that a great deal of the “ostrich-approach” sinks in with me.  Kinda scary.   Further along in the blog, Niell mentions a list he created of “Random Acts of Courage” with suggestions like: “offer a stranger a hug, haggle over the price of something, strike up a conversation with a homeless person, etc.”  These are all things that do take an “nth” of courage…

Anyways, here is the quote, and a link to the article.

“You must confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.”
by: Niall Doherty


There’s no difference between a pessimist who says, “Oh, it’s hopeless, so don’t bother doing anything,” and an optimist who says, “Don’t bother doing anything, it’s going to turn out fine anyway.” Either way, nothing happens. – Yvon Chouinard

Here is the link to the Random Acts of Courage: http://www.ndoherty.com/random-acts-of-courage/

I need a plan


There is something about
Sharpie markers that bring the world into focus.  If I want change, I am going to need a plan.  Sometimes its as simple as some markers and post its.  Lots of pink, of course.

I pretty much mapped out what I want to happen in my life…with the exception of marrying Jon Bon Jovi.  That’s a given.

Over the past two years, in the midst of life, I have been doing a great deal of spiritual exploration.  I think that really needs to continue.

I also need to try and have a little fun.  I think I might even try smile meditation again.  (from Eat, Pray, Love- the book, NOT the movie).

If I sit here and look at the big picture, it overwelms the sprinkles out of me.  So, one day at a time…one step at a time.

Look out world, Sunshine has sharpie markers!!!